Before the Bench (105 of 365)

Day 105 of the 365 day poem challenge.

Word of the day Inimical: " not friendly."

For all you non-lawyers out there "the Bench" is a reference to a Judges bench.

Before the Bench 

Idly I doubted 

Idly I pounded my head 

Idly I demanded more

Idly I paused considered 

Discerned 

A miasma of competing 

Anxieties rose up to meet me

Possibilities formulating and stewing inside of me

Idly I watched the decision be made

Idly I sit on my hands

Idly I blush red in fear in rage 

Embarrassed 

Must my hands fidget

Must this room compress in on itself

Must there be so many eyes positioned upon me

Idly I ensure my demise

Idly I listen to orators 

Idly I flap my lips

Idly I turn the cheek

Foolishness 

Must it be so inimical 

Must this be my turn

Must I subjugate myself before

Authority 

Must I condemn myself to impotence  

Idly I draw my body down

Idly I kiss the earth and cross

My heart and hope to die.